Rock Solid Relationships

My work is to assist individuals and couples in their quest for a perfect relationship together.

The Lifelong Quest

The aims of couple sessions are to be healing and character building, leading each couple to an enduring relationship, i.e. a couple relationship that lasts forever and improves over time.

The aims include an invitation to you both to strive to create goodwill in the relationship and to help each of you to honour each other’s boundaries.

The Aims of Couple Sessions

marriage counsellor
Personal Statement of Belonging

I strive to create a practice where belonging is fostered. We as humans experience wide diversity across beliefs and values. This diversity can be expected in those who seek my help. 

Amidst this diversity, I strive for an inclusive practice where people of diverse beliefs can feel a sense of belonging.

Belonging and inclusivity invites any, and all, to find an equal place in my practice.

I hope you’ll find that you belong here.

Areas of my work with couples:

  • establishing honesty
  • offering transparency
  • creating a level playing field of knowledge
  • building trust
New Habits of Trust

  • feel heard again
  • respectful listening
  • intentional turns at speaking
  • non-defensiveness
  • opening up to talk
  • finding ways to go-on in the relationship
  • words that transform
  • negotiating relational space
  • florishing relationship communication
  • ways to connect with words
Florishing Communication

  • rekindling the love
  • restoring physical intimacy
  • finding safe boundaries
  • untangling irreconcilable differences
  • inviting helpful thinking
  • same partner, new dance: discovering helpful cycles in the relationship
    Untangling Issues

    Grief when the loved one has gone ahead.

    • stillborn / miscarriage / missed miscarriage
    • a child
    • a parent
    • a partner

    marriage counsellor hamilton

    "I'm a person couples consult with about problems.

    I work with couples and relationships in the areas of couple communication, relationship recovery and rebuilding trust and love.

    Research-based relationship tools and couple communication skills seem to enable couple connection and intimacy."

    Henk Ensing

    Member IAMFC (International Association of Marriage and Family Counselling)

    In the couple session …

    Talk about the issues or hot topics

    Learn how to communicate with each other

    Change your future together


    "When there's a struggle to communicate, intentional communication can bring hope and change."

    Couples are often surprised at how relationship change can occur in when intentional communication is engaged and adopted.

    This is non-clinical transformative relationship work."

    Your Session

    My work is focused on relationship dynamics, ways of thinking and ways of going on together in the relationship. It includes relationship repairs, exploring cognitive distortions and attending to conflict in communication. Power operations and consent. Loss of trust and hypervigilance. Unhelpful communication patterns and bickering. I refer any MHD (Mental Health Disorders) as I do not diagnose or attend to MHD. If you want diagnosis of mental health disorders, I recommend you contact a General Family Counsellor.

    Scope of Practice

    Instead of focusing on mental disorders, my focus is on improving relationship dynamics and couple communication.

    Identifying cognitive distortions and gaining insight into helpful and unhelpful cycles that may be playing out is part of my work.

    I continually question the thinking I support in therapeutic conversations.

    "As therapists, we are responsible for the consequenses of what we do, say and think" and "we have a special responsiblity to consider the ways in which we may have unwittingly reproduced assumptions about life and identity that are disqualifying of diversity in people's acts of living, and the ways in which we may have inadvertantly colluded with the power relations of local culture" (White, M., 2007), social discourse or assumed beliefs.

    I strive to continually question the metaphors I support in therapeutic conversations as part of this special responsibility.


    White, Michael. 2007, Maps of Narrative Practice, 2007, pp 30-31).

    Thoughts on Responsibility - Henk Ensing

    Postliminary Studies

    Advanced Skills in Narrative Practice I