Couple conversations can get derailed. Derailment is a metaphor. It means that the conversation becomes like a train off the tracks.
Sometimes this means the conversation stops, as one or both choose not to speak as to avoid conflict. This is described as stonewalling.
However, there is one relationship tool that can help. It is a couple communication tool can help to put conversations on the rails right from the start of the conversation.
It also helps to keep couple conversations on the tracks. It is known as the Couple Dialog.
With regular practice, a couple can become skilled in having intentional conversations. By fostering and privileging intentional communication, a couple can communicate about frustrations in the relationship.
Even the biggest relationship issues can be discussed without the conversation becoming derailed. However, fluency requires practice.
Brief, 15-minute, couple conversations practiced almost daily will bring the best results.
The Couple Dialog is an intentional way to communicate that can be used when the natural ways to communicate no longer work well.
The Couple Dialog is an intentional process that couples can learn to help them talk about all sorts of issues, even the big issues.
The next 7 days
In the second session you will have practiced being The Receiver and The Speaker. You might have enough experience in these roles to be able to engage in a conversation about a ‘frustration topic’. You may have a ‘frustration topic’ you want to discuss with your partner.
Using the Couple Dialog, you can use The Frustration as the topic. You can have a conversation about The Frustration instead of “What Happened in my day”. Instead of talking about “Appreciations”.
Henk Ensing, IAMFC
“I work with couples and relationships in the areas of couple communication, relationship recovery and rebuilding trust and love.”