Couple Relationship Tools

The work I do is with couples and couple relationships. If there are issues around trust, intimacy, an apology process, healing past hurts, communicating, feeling heard, or feelings of drifting apart in the relationship, then book a session with me.

My Focus is on Couple Relationships

I work with couples who are struggling in their relationship. Couples have a wide variety of challenges that can challenge the relationship.

Changing the way you both talk

I help couples to use relationship tools and new ways of communicating as means to seek lasting change that works.

Stopping the Dance / Cycle

Sometimes it seems like the couple are in a cycle of unhelpful communication. We can practice relationship tools to cahnge that in each session.

It usually takes weeks of regualr practice at home for about 15 minutes a day before the couple skills are fluent. By then you may feel more comfortable addressing the frustrations in the relationship.

Within four weeks of using the tools you could both be in a far better position to address the big issues while using the new couple communication tools.

So it does take time and practice. And the change can be big.

Couple Relationship Work

I work specifically with couples and relationships. This is my scope of practice. This is not General Family Counselling.

General Family Counselling (GFC) includes schizophrenia, eating disorders, grief counselling, depression, anxiety, and mental health issues. I specifically work only with couple relationships. I do not offer GFC.

If instead of General Family Counselling (GFC), you need specific couple relationship work, (e.g. couple communication, couple conflict, physical intimacy desire mismatch, arguments or frustrations in the relationship) then book a couple session with me.

Couple Communication Help

Finding New Ways to Go-On in the Relationship

Sometimes couples need to find new ways to go-on together in the relationship together. If the old way has stopped working a new way forward needs to be created.

Feeling Heard by Your Partner

In particular, I work with couples in a variety of ways around couple communication. If you need to be able to communicate so you feel heard and understood then book a couple session here.

Conversations around the Big Issues

These are ways that are free from criticism, defensiveness, contempt or stonewalling. My work is around helping couples to talk to each other about the big issues in the relationship.

“Healthy communication is the effective exchange of thoughts and feelings between people. It often involves people taking turns speaking and listening. Ideally, when you engage in healthy communication, the people involved are devoted to the exchange. Both people are aware of how they are acting during the conversation.

For instance, if you are the speaker, you might be making eye contact or using your body language to express that you are present and engaged” (Scott, 2022).

If you are the listener, you are open to hearing what the speaker is saying and not cutting them off from finishing a sentence or focusing your attention on what you’re going to say next (Arendt, 2019).

By Henk Ensing. Book a session with me in my Frankton, Hamilton room here.


Arendt JFW, Pircher Verdorfer A, Kugler KG. Mindfulness and leadership: Communication as a behavioral correlate of leader mindfulness and its effect on follower satisfactionFront Psychol. 2019;10:667. doi:10.3389/fpsyg.2019.00667

Scott, Elizabeth, How to Improve Your Relationships With Effective Communication Skills, Jan 2022.